The Struggle is Real: Giving Thanks in All Things
It’s hard to give thanks. Thankfulness is not for the faint of heart, especially when things don’t go your way.
At the moment I’m thankful for the small things, like getting ambitions accomplished while my little one sleeps.
Guys, this mom/parenting thing is no joke. I feel like I’ve hit a mountain requiring thoughtful and intentional effort. And I just want to be honest: I struggle with this daily these days. I don’t know how you do it, parents, especially with a brain disorder in active status.
I may not be in an episode of mania or depression, but I think parenting is its own challenge. I flip through my social media feeds and a fellow writer friend posts about structuring daily activities with toddlers, setting aside different rooms for different activities.
I can’t even. The guilt starts. I ignore the suggestions for the moment, but really, I see my inability to cope, on some level, to be a recipe for disappointing my child. I don’t know, I’ve never raised a child before, and now I wish I’d read dozens of books on parenting before I had my child. Because, really, where is the time even to read anymore? I feel like it’s blowing in the wind.
Maybe you can relate. But even more importantly– what do you think to yourself when you’re ready to lose all patience under heaven?
I may be overreacting a bit, typing this frantically before Little Miss wakes. I know I can’t do it all…but isn’t it tempting to think I could?
Do you daydream, fellow mamas, of the day your little toddler is off to school and your days can come into focus again? Do you struggle in the present toddler age and stage to be present and play blocks, while conflicted because you want to produce and create content?
Last week I spoke with my therapist about my resistance to implementing a daily routine with my toddler. Resistance was the word that we tossed around, as was resentful, as was reconciliation. But I’m still not sure how to frame up my perspective. Can you relate? Any wisdom for the wondering mom?
For the next few months, especially, I will have to adjust to a lifestyle of something like corralling cats, with some help from family, but mostly with a lot of coffee, escape blog posts, and the grace of God.
Bear with me, and stay bold, brave, and REAL.
Katie
14 Comments
Caroline
Oh Katie, I so relate to this post! The toddler years with my sweet boy were wonderful but definitely challenging for me! It absolutely gets easier as they become more independent. As a fellow Mama who has so many interests (and focus issues), I just try to always lead with, “Bind my wandering heart to Thee…” and like you said, trust His grace will meet me wherever I am on the particular day. Thank goodness it does! Hugs!
Katie
Caroline, thank you for your encouragement! I think you’re right – it will get easier as she gets older and more independent. Love that you surrender to His grace. I appreciate you!
Regina Poynter
Hello Katie, Parenting definitely has it’s tiresome moments and when we have Bipolar we can experience challenges. Take days out for self-care and remember that this season of parenting will pass. I pray ? God will bless you abundantly with an extra measure of His grace. Blessings, Regina
Katie
Hi Regina! Thank you for understanding. I hope I enjoy it more, it’s been hard the way things are at this point in time. Thank you for your kindness. Appreciate you!
cynthiakilter
Hi Katie, it can really be overwhelming. I think the most important beneficial routine we set up was bedtime. It wasn’t all restriction. It was also bath time, story time, and singing time. It was good for our kids and for us. And it did limit what we could do with our evenings. Even though kids resist, quite a bit, they do find comfort in routine as well.
Katie
Cynthia, I think you’re so right. There’s good in structure and routine. We have had a good bedtime routine established since birth, and now it is a challenge – at least the last 4 nights have been lol. Thanks so much for your feedback and understanding!!
Jessica
It’s hard to not feel pulled in a thousand directions as a parent and especially when your kids need you. It is helpful to have structure or daily routine in your child’s day that includes time while they play independently and you have some time for you. Losing patience does happen (sometimes more often than we like) but it’s important to take a deep breath and even pivot to a change of scenery. Don’t be afraid to ask for help or support from those around you if you need some time out time 🙂
Katie
Definitely, Jessica! I hear you on the routine, I think I like your suggestion on pivoting and changing scenery and deep breaths — all very helpful. And asking for help. Great advice, thank you!!
Carlene Hill Byron
Katie, what if you think of your life like a year worth of a tree’s life? The busiest of the parenting years don’t leave much time or energy for a parent’s personal interests and goals. They’re like the summer of a tree’s life: all of the trees on the hill just look green and merge into each other, as they all produce chlorophyll to produce food and growth. It’s not till the productive season slows that the tree shows its uniqueness, when chlorophyll productivity gives way to the bright pigmentation that has been in the leaves all along.
If you’re in a chlorophyll season right now, know that God is nurturing and maturing the brilliant colors that will show later. All the best!
Katie
Wow, LOVE this analogy Carlene! Thank you for that insight! I’m gonna chew on this lol! that’s deep, but hits home. Thank you!
tammykennington
Katie,
As a seasoned mother of four on the verge of the empty nest, I can empathize. Each season has its struggles. Toddlerhood will slip by in the blink of a weary eye and you’ll wonder where the gooey handprints went. Hang in there, little mama!
Blessings to you,
Tammy
BTW–Thanks for linking up with Truth & Grace.
Katie
Tammy, thank you for your understanding. That honestly chokes me up! You are so right. Appreciate you!
Lisa notes...
I remember those days, Katie. So many moms will relate to what you’re feeling here. I recently read a great little book called “How to Keep House While Drowning.” It had a lot of great insights (and practical tips too) on keeping things in perspective.
Katie
Lisa, thank you for that! I need practical, and insights, and perspective!! Thank you for stopping by and posting your thoughts. Great to hear from you. 🙂